rosie battista

How to Get Good at Self Love

Self Love is an art and a practice.

The thing about a SELF LOVE practice is that you get to be in charge of how it unfolds. You can’t get it wrong or screw it up. You just keep practicing.

Everything improves with practice. 30 years ago I taught myself calligraphy by practicing every day for a few hours as I rode the ferry boat home from my job in NYC. And I got good at it. Good enough to create a lucrative small business that I was able to do when my children where growing up.

There are many benefits to the practice of self love. With self love in play, you can be free from victimhood to any situation, circumstance or relationship. During every interaction or encounter you gain the skill to look with different eyes and see more clearly what is real.

The idea is to feel good.

Okay, I’ll admit clarity can sometimes be annoying in it’s eye-opening way. Being awake and aware shows you many new things. It can sometimes feel like a heavy brick flung at your somewhat hard head. But the gentler you become with yourself (this happens thru your practice), the more you observe without judgment what is really true. I share with you my own experience as I consistently and continually work on noticing the role I am playing in a situation. I notice what part I own, what belongs to me and what doesn’t.

I don’t always get it right.

Sometimes I feel like crap (that’s a sure sign that I’m off my path) and so I get back on it when I am ready.

This practice and awareness is what gives me immense power in my life.

I used to live a life of “Why would they do that to me?” and “How could you do such a thing to me? It would drive me nuts to try and understand why people did what they did and why I was hurt over it. You know the kinda crap I’m referring to. The kind that makes you feel like crap. The kind that give you no control. The kind that serves no one and that ends you feeling miserable, unlovable and not enough. It’s much easier to change your own thoughts, your own actions, your SELF. And quite impossible of you to expect to change someone else. Seriously it will never happen. They won’t change for you or because of you.

Expecting someone else to change is a set up for disappointment. The sooner you embrace that idea that Self love is the answer to the change you desire, the more power-filled you become. Self love is the ultimate life changer.

Once you have a practice going, everything in your life will feel and look better. I promise. It goes like that. So if you are feeling a little or a lot like a victim, no matter what circumstance or what person is causing you to feel angst, I invite you to indulge in a massive dose of extreme self love and extraordinary self care. Here are 3 steps that you can walk into right now that will put your directly on the path to self love.

1) Lose the fake stuff and get real.

Make a daily game out of your meals. How much of your meal can you make healthier, real and naked (food in it’s own natural form)? Ask yourSelf at every meal, “Is this the most loving thing I can feed myself?” At first this may taste weird, but with practice your body will change for the better.

Practice. Practice. Practice.

2) Become less interested in why you can’t.

Make a daily game out of your words. Can you catch the times you’re trash talking about how you can’t do something? Stop it. Don’t speak those words. If you start to think these thoughts about yourSelf, notice the thought, and let if flow by. Then replace it with a new idea. At first this will sound weird, but with practice your thoughts will change for the better.

Practice. Practice. Practice.

3) Fall in love.

Can you get real with yourself? Before jumping in the shower, can you stand in front of the mirror and look at it? Can you say “HELLO GORGEOUS” followed by one nice compliment to and about yourself? You CAN find something ! Your hair, your eyes, your lips. Pick that thing and focus only on that one thing. Leave the rest alone. At first this may feel weird and different but with practice you will feel better and better.

Practice. Practice. Practice.

Let me know how your PRACTICE MAKES BETTER and post your comment below.

Label Limitations

A label tells you what’s inside. They can be somewhat useful if the item is a box of oreo cookies. But even then, labels lie. A label is the only the perception of person slapping it on.

I am anti-labels. I’m just not a fan of them. I don’t eat food with labels, define my relationships by them or stuff myself into a category of any kind. Labels limit you to the definition you attach to the label.

I am not just this or that. I am many things. I am no-thing.

And the one thing that continues to irk me when I hear it used as a reference to define my age is this one:

Hello “woman of a certain age”! Grrrr…..Each article, ad, or post that passes my way causes me to cringe.

What the heck does that mean anyway ?

So I turned to my friend google for some answers and oh boy, did she provide an array. None of which make the matter better. The Oxford English Dictionary defined that sense of certain as “which it is not polite or necessary further to define.”

The phrase was re-popularized in a 1979 book by the psychotherapist Lillian B. Rubin, “Women of a Certain Age: The Midlife Search for Self,” in which midlife spanned 35 to 54. OH crap! Where is that gonna put me now that I am 55? Does it catapult me into another category which will then define what I should and shouldn’t be able or willing to do – because of that number?

SO STOP IT. I am not this or that woman of a certain anything.

The only thing that is certain is that

I AM WHAT I AM.
and WHAT I AM IS AMAZING.

No matter what the number on my certificate indicates.

I don’t do numbers, sizes or ages.

Can we as women choose to be amazing at every turn, juncture, step and mis-step?

Can we change our minds about aging? Embrace the changes. Enjoy the changes. Welcome the changes. Because they’re coming. Botox Babes and Surgery Sisters beware ~ you are not stopping the inevitable.   Instead of trying so hard to change your body, change your mind… do good things for yourself, treat yourself well with food, and doses of fun, and tons of fabulous to all areas of your life.

Age is a only a mindset. At a certain age you understand this. And when you do, you stay young because you do what you love and what you want without the restrictions. (and fyi, the only one that can restrict what you do or designate it “age appropriate” is you – it’s all made up and it’s all up to you).

I don’t do age “appropriate”.

I often forget how many years I have been around until I do the math and even then I usually miscalculate the addition.

Because I feel what I feel. I don’t feel OLD.

To be clear. Is my body changing? YES. Is my mind changing? YES. My body is experiencing different and and my mind is experiencing different. Is that bad thing? Or is it just a thing?

I’m taking a page from my Dad’s book of life. That man has no concept of how things “should” be. He rocks amazingness. He’s on no meds, has a full time career in NYC, takes public transportation to get there, works the nite and holiday shifts, lifts weights daily, keeps a daily food journal, has a boys nite ‘in’ (watching movies) with high school friends, is GCing the addition on his home, and doing all the physical work and has 3 girl friends. Oh and he’s 74, if you are keeping score.   SO.. when I say “Dad ~ What is your secret? He smiles and says, I can’t hear you, that’s my deaf ear. I just smile back because the truth is that he can’t hear me. He doesn’t understand the question? To him there is no secret, he’s not aware of any other way of being.

He is just being who is with no attachment to any ideas, excuses or reasons he can’t.

What’s the motto of this story? Lose your attachment to the aging and anti-aging thing. Stop trying not to age. Stop defining yourself by what should happen at a certain number.

One thing I know for certain… this woman is all that. All that she is meant to be. I am that I am.

I invite you to think about who you are? By what definition are you willing to define yourself? Can you remove the label you’ve placed there? And can you remove the limiting beliefs that you’ve set for yourself ?

Can you stand tall and proud and say

“I AM ALL THAT I AM . AND all that I am is amazing. “

Count On This Self Love Practice

You can count on this self love practice.

This Love-You-Tensil works for you!

The more you remind yourSelf, the quicker you form a new habit. Taking this one small step will result in huge changes in how you think and feel.

WATCH THIS 50 SECOND VIDEO INSTRUCTIONS for HOW TO.

I know you can count and you can count on this.

Hey, if you love this idea, there’s much more in #XSL21, the 21 day self love course and it’s my gift to YOU! Start here to sign up.

Find yourSelf Here.

There is no there.

Here is where you are.

After practicing self love consistently and persistently, I can promise you this….

LISTEN HERE FOR THE PROMISES OF WHAT CAN HAPPEN IN 21 DAYS.

Click to watch the video

There is no there.

But you’ll find yourself HERE:

Self discovery mode.

Awareness mode.

Moving forward mode.

Stepping it up mode.

This feels really good mode.

And this is rockin’ awesome. It’s power-filled and moving!

And then from here, anything and everything is possible.

I can’t wait to see you there. (HEEEHEHEH) I mean here. Right here.

Share the love,

Is Your Thinking the Cause of Your Struggles?

Could it be that the thoughts you are thinking are the cause of your struggles?

Here’s why that happens.

Your thoughts cause the feeling that cause the reaction. And BAM… then you have a situation that may be not exactly what you want.

SO STOP IT. Stop thinking.

I know. It may sound a bit harsh. But bear with me as I get attempt to get your attention. I share all of this from my heart with the most loving intention.

WATCH THE VIDEO IF YOU WANT TO SEE ME FIRED UP TO GET YOU FIRED UP.

Watch the video.

I’m so excited that you’re here and have decided to show up for yourSelf.

Because here is where you can learn to replace that old thinking that does not serve you well and replace it with a different way of thinking… and with that your life will unfold in the most amazing ways.

Take the course here. It’s free and it’s my gift to you.

I see your awesome shining bright. I’m simply here to remind you of that,

Selflove is a process.

I thought I had it down to a science.

I’d get manicures, pedicures. Do nice little things for myself. Sometimes.

However.

BAM! That was not the real deal. Selflove is much more that. The real stuff is deep. That’s why it’s a process. It takes “work” on self and digging around to bring it to the surface.

Learn more in this video.

CLICK HERE TO WATCH VIDEO.

Big changes happened in the process of embracing self love. When you invite this idea into your life and consciousness, it’s a game changer for your life. I invite you to jump on in here with me

What do you choose for your awesome self?

Here’s a little hint: Choose love.

I invite you to take the free course on 21 days of extreme self love, so that you can experience for yourself how different life can be when you put yourSelf first.

Love, Love and even more Love,

rosie battista

1) Lose the fake stuff and get real.

2) Become less interested in why you can’t.

3) Fall in love.

I AM WHAT I AM. and WHAT I AM IS AMAZING.

Can you stand tall and proud and say

“I AM ALL THAT I AM . AND all that I am is amazing. “

You can count on this self love practice.

Here is where you are.

There is no there.

SO STOP IT. Stop thinking.

Take the course here. It’s free and it’s my gift to you.

What do you choose for your awesome self?

I AM WHAT I AM.
and WHAT I AM IS AMAZING.